Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Growth And Potential: It's Like A Motivational Speech!

In a house I'd never been in before I am watching TV. I am in a dark room where the only light is from the television. There is also a light on outside the room, in the hallway leading to the bathroom where Neil is, I think. The carpet is brown and not at all sexy but comforting still.

The program on TV is an 80s version of Pokemon, supposedly. Pikachu only appears briefly. The other characters are played by Sarah Schultz and Jocelyn Smith, whom I have known since childhood. Jocelyn is dressed in black with a veil covering her face and this last detail makes it difficult at first to tell who she is, but I do after some time.

I call to Neil who is in the bathroom, or hallway leading to it, out of sight, to tell him I have seen familiars on national TV. He comes in, shaded greatly and obscure and not impressed. He probably doesn't even know Sarah. My father is in the bedroom across the hallway, sleeping with the door open and is annoyed by my calling, whether he says so or not.

I am in the kitchen of my parents' house with my cousin, Luke. Standing in front of the toaster, I look down to find a single, larger than usual egg on my plate. It is covered in pepper, really covered, and the yolk has been punctured and runs just barely. The orange is quite stunning and beautiful.

I am looking at myself in the mirror, in this house here in Austin, at my beautiful, long hair, which reaches my jaw. It is shaped perfectly, which tells me, at long last, that there is nothing wrong enough with me.